Companions from the educational institution
In the halls of a typical school, the experience of being an outsider can shape a student's social development in profound ways. This article follows the story of a student, referred to as the speaker, who faced such challenges and the lessons they learned along the way.
The speaker, a loner in primary school, was known by association with their popular younger brother. However, their social life was far from ordinary. The speaker did not respond to the speaker's attempts to befriend them, and the speaker felt that they might have been the target of a bullying incident. The speaker kept their head down after the incident, and the two never spoke again.
The speaker's classmate, another outcast, was once tied up in a hedge by bullies. This incident, along with the constant drawing of crude biro penises on the speaker's notebook pages by another student, added to the speaker's feelings of isolation and anxiety. The student who drew the penises was an avid squirrel photographer, owning an SLR camera and spending weekends capturing these furry creatures. Despite the speaker's repeated declines, the student persistently begged the speaker to join them in their squirrel-photography adventures.
The speaker eventually agreed, just to stop the invitations. Yet, the speaker and the student had different interests, with the speaker showing no enthusiasm for the Cincinnati Bengals or Whitesnake, the student's favourite bands. This difference in interests, coupled with the speaker's desire for authentic connections, led to the speaker trying to befriend the student after the incident, but the attempt was unsuccessful.
The speaker's experience highlights the negative impact of social exclusion on a student's social development. Being socially marginalized often increases social anxiety and stress, as students struggle to find acceptance and a peer group. This lack of connection can hinder their social skills and emotional well-being.
However, the story does not end there. In secondary school, the speaker associated with other misfits, including overweight, spotty, and medieval role-play obsessive students. This group provided the speaker with a sense of belonging and acceptance that was missing in their primary school years.
The recognition that differences can also be sources of strength and identity is important for social resilience. Engagement in extracurricular activities and clubs tailored to personal interests also enriches students' social lives and buffers against social isolation, helping them build peer networks and develop social skills.
In conclusion, social exclusion or feeling like an outsider in school can impair social development by increasing isolation and anxiety, but supportive relationships, involvement in interest-based activities, and opportunities for student voice can mitigate these effects and foster positive social growth. The speaker's journey serves as a reminder of the challenges faced by many students and the potential for growth and resilience when supported appropriately.
[References] [1] Hughes, C., & Coatsworth, J. D. (2014). The role of parenting in the development of children's social competence and emotional well-being: A meta-analytic review. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 33(8), 763-803. [2] Hawkins, J. D., Catalano, R. F., Kosterman, R. (2003). The Social Development Model and Program: Theory, Research, and Practice. Guilford Press. [4] Espelage, D. L., & Swearer, S. M. (2004). Bullying in schools: Prevalence, dynamics, and consequences. Educational Psychology in Practice, 20(4), 201-208.
The speaker's personal growth was significantly influenced by their relationships and lifestyle in school, which were marked by social exclusion and bullying. Despite the struggles, the speaker eventually found a sense of belonging in a group of misfits, fostering a crucial aspect of their education-and-self-development. Engaging in interest-based activities can help students build peer networks, promoting positive social growth and emotional well-being, as shown in the speaker's journey.
